This is not a hate blog about the discontentment people have towards millennials. Actually it is quite the opposite. Being a late millennial myself, I err on the side of appreciating and valuing what my generation has brought to the table. I believe that the reason why older generations have such discord when speaking about “these kids nowadays” is because we embody CHANGE; and change equals fear. Let me break it down for you. Any time something changes, especially when it is towards things like traditions, social norms, cultural expectations, etc. it usually elicits people to evaluate and compare, which usually results in defensiveness, anger, and/or confusion. As a result, this makes it more likely to be close minded and form an “us vs. them” mentality. Hence why I said earlier that change equals fear.
Let’s be honest, change is scary. However, just because something is scary doesn’t mean we avoid, dismiss, undermine, and/or attack it. I mean haven’t you seen any good action movie? The only way for the hero to win is to face the thing everyone is afraid of. Like a hero, therapists would say that in order to get over a fear is to understand it. FACTS and KNOWLEDGE are the kryptonite to fear. Typically the more you learn about something, it will dispel any assumptions or preconceived thoughts you might have associated to it. Most people tend to assume the worst or simply adopt the assumptions that others already have. The reason is simple, it is easier to follow the herd then to form your own opinion. It takes too much time and energy to make the effort to learn about something that seems foreign to us, especially if it places us in a position that might question our own way of living.
At the end of the day we are all PEOPLE. The only difference is that we grow up in different eras and whatever era that we are born into, which was left behind from previous generations, we must adapt to it. In the era of millennials we place more value on experiences, our own personal interests/goals, and self actualization due to shaping events such as 9/11, the great recession, and technological explosion of social media. I have empathy for the previous generations, they too experienced many radical changes in their eras due to world war II and the cold war, the beginning of the digital world, and changes in societal norms (latchkey generation, hippie movement, and increase in divorce) which drastically impacted their beliefs and values.
The thing is, each generation simply tries to do better from previous mistakes that other generations have made. Sometimes we achieve that and sometime we don’t and we have to rely on the next generation to take the baton, continue to evolve, and do better.
So, instead of pointing out all the things that are “wrong” with each generation. How about you take a second to find out all the good that each generation has offered us and for millennials I think we offer something pretty invaluable. I mean avocado toast is pretty amazing, especially if it is accompanied with bottomless mimosas with the option of substituting a variety of different juices (pineapple is one of my favorites). In addition, I love that my generation is taking on the challenge of normalizing, valuing, and seeking mental wellness into their everyday life. Full disclosure, I might be a little biased being a therapist myself but since being in the field I can say most of my clients are millennials and generation Z age range. Seeking mental health treatment historically has been perceived as a weakness and meant for only the severely mentally ill. The stigma around mental health still very much exist in all generations, however, millennials and the current generation of young people are pioneering to shift that perspective by being more open about seeking mental health services. In my opinion, it takes a lot of strength to go against societal and sometimes cultural expectations when it comes to reaching out for help. Anytime you are going against the grain it is an uphill battle and requires a lot of mental and emotional strength.
So the next time you feel the need to bash an entire generation of people, take a second and ask yourself “what exactly am I afraid of that’s bringing out my defensiveness?” Then, take a bite out of your avocado toast, a sip of your mimosa, and note in your journal what answer you came up with so you can talk about it with your therapist at your next session.